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A young ventriloquist is touring the
clubs
and one night he's doing a show in a small club in a small town in
Arkansas. With his dummy on his knee, he's going through his usual
dumb blonde jokes when a blonde woman in the fourth row stands on her
chair and starts shouting: "I've heard enough of your stupid
blonde
jokes. What makes you think you can stereotype women that way?
What does the
color of a person's hair have to do with her worth as
a human being?
It's guys like you who keep women like me from
being respected at work
and in the community and from reaching our full
potential as a person,
because you and your kind continue to
perpetuate discrimination
against, not only blondes, but women in
general...and all in the name of
humor!"The ventriloquist is embarrassed
and begins to apologize, when the
blonde yells, "You stay out of
this, mister! I'm talking to that
little idiot on your knee!"
There where two snakes talking.
The 1st
one said 'Sidney, are we the type of snakes who wrap ourselves
around our prey and squeeze and crush until they're dead? Or are we
the type of snake who ambush our prey and bite them and they are
poisioned?'.
Then the second Snake says "Why do you ask?"
The 1st one replies: "I just bit my lip!"
The manager of a large city
zoo was drafting a
letter to order a pair of animals. He sat at his
computer and typed
the following sentence: "I would like to place an
order for two
mongooses, to be delivered at your earliest convenience."
He stared
at the screen, focusing on that odd word mongooses. Then he
deleted
the word and added another, so that the sentence now read: "I
would
like to place an order for two mongeese, to be delivered at your
earliest convenience."
Again he stared at the screen, this time
focusing on the new word,
which seemed just as odd as the original
one. Finally, he deleted the whole
sentence and started all over.
"Everyone knows no full-stocked zoo
should be without a mongoose," he
typed. "Please send us two of
them."
(i do not know what it is about you that closes
and opens; only something in me understands
the voice of your eyes is deeper than all roses)
nobody, not even the rain, has such small hands e e cummings
...it is as hard to do your duty when men are sneering at you as when they are shooting at you. Woodrow Wilson
[The television is] an invention that permits you to be entertained in your living room by people you wouldn't have in your home. David FrostThe Ocean's Cry for Help: Gotta-See Videos
What happens if we kill the world's oceans? Nothing good.
Pit Bulls Not Vicious, Ohio Says: DNews Nuggets
After a heroic pit bull named Lily saves her owner's life, Ohio reverses its position on the breed.
Kids Use Kinect for Robot Competition
A kit containing 600 to 700 parts, including Kinect hardware and software, was used to build basketball-shooting robots.
Bigfoot and Yeti DNA Study Gets Serious
A call is out for supposed Big Foot material so university scientists can do genetic testing.
Hurricane Season Comes Early This Year
Meteorologists named the first storm of the 2012 hurricane season this year: tropical storm Alberto is starting the party early.